Every time I attend funeral services for an Old Order Mennonite family member or friend, I wish those “outside” could experience their death rituals, rich with culture, community, and faith. The horse-drawn hearse and the four-part-harmony singing make me cry every time.
This week I attended the funeral for my great Aunt Mary. Later that evening, I wrote this poem about the graveside portion of the service.
Stoic Hope
Regina Cyzick Harlow
2/27/2018
From Aunt Mary Beery’s funeral
Shovels scratch
Dirt onto the coffin
Filling the grave
Formed from dust
To dust returning
Mourners
Black hats
Black shawls
Sturdy shoes
Singing
Shoveling
Discretely wiping tears
Faint florals blend
With horses
Leather
Farm
And moth balls
Wafting on the breeze
Sunshine
Blue sky
Breathing deep
Crisp air
Inhaling the promise
Of Living Hope
For those unfamiliar with Old Order Mennonites, they are often confused with Amish because they drive horse and buggy, dress plainly, and live simple agrarian lives. My family and I were raised in the Old Order Mennonite faith, and while I had my reasons for leaving as a young adult, I hold many things and people dear from their community.
My friend, Ava, wrote an in-depth article about their death rituals here. She captures the essence of what happens at the time of death through the funeral in vivid beautiful detail.
Love your poem, it’s beautiful! I was raised Old Order as well, and hubby is from the “outside” 😉 He dearly loves to go to Old Order funerals with me. 🙂
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Thank you, Jeanette. I’m glad you liked the poem.
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